In my mind..lots of things..no room,can’t let you in…yet..

Mari kita mulakan entry nih dgn sedikt cerita..hehe..

Aku ader tanyer fifi-kun haritu,what does he think about what i wrote here?
candidly he answered

"Best.Saye suke bace."

komen dari mulut patut ader insurance mcm dier tu,boley dipakai la kot..haha..aku tanya lagi

"apsal plak?"

(ececece..mcm komen awal tuh tak cukup lagi la..hehe..cam nak dgr comformation plak ngahahaha)

"sbb kak marlina cerite/tulis bende mcm tader selindung-selindung or belok2..straight to the point"

heh…jawapan tu buatkan aku sengeh2 dan terus terang mate(masa tu tgh stay up kononnyer la..untuk exam the next day)

aper ekk aku nak citer kali nih…

erm..okeh..tak lama sebelum nih,aku tiba2 menjadi rujukan beberapa rakan yang meminta pandangan..aku terkedu,terkejut la gak sbb,aper la yg derang nampak kat aku yg hampeh nih menyebabkan derang nak mintak pandangan..huhu..i think im the last person you should ask for opinion when you’re in a vulnerable situation,coz my blunt comments will sometimes hurt…

anyway,aku sedar apa yang aku buat tu maybe agak melukakan but aku sedia jadik org jahat dlm cerita hidup derang..coz sometimes you have to face some kind of opposing force in your fight for what you believe in or fight to find and keeping happiness in your life..and i’m happy being who i am..Telling things as it is..

Mungkin ader org salah paham dgn entry2 sayer sebelum nih yang menyebabkan dier raser saye org yg sesuai untuk diadukan masalah..hehe..jadinya let me tell things as it is,supaya mana2 pihak yg mahu mengadu masalah selepas ini tidak tersalah faham..

saya tak pernah berada dlm mana2 love relationship yg boleh dipanggilkan relationship..hehe..2 daripadanya hanya dari jauh dan yg terakhir ni,terpaksa ditamatkan segera diatas sebab tidak perlu dijelaskan secara panjang lebar..cukup la saye describekan sbg
"coz i saw the end before we begin.."(petikan dari Goodbye My Lover,James Blunt)

 

Some info about me

i consider myself as a good judge of character..(a good one,not perfect,remember this)..I love observing people..Usually in a group of people i will always know who’s into who..and all other stuff la yg berkaitan..saye bukan tunggul kayu yg tidak berperasaan jauh sekali unapproacable..but hehehe..saye akui muke saye nih look intense/serious/purposeful…bg org yg tak kenal,mereka menganggap saye nih garang dan sombong..nak kenal dgn saye senang jer..introduce yourself properly like we, human beings do..

when i can’t give you what you come to seek from me,i will tell you as such…and if i can’t be discreet(for obvious reason,that you’re not being clear too)..i will not encourage you..not at all any reflection of who you are,but i guess,masa tak sesuai or hehe..i have already had someone in mind..ngehngeh…(tetiba aku raser entry nih giler3 syok sendiri…ngahaha..lantak pi la..hehe..)

entahla..friends advice me to keep my heart open to new possibilities,but maybe i’m still dwelling in the past..kekadang raser bersalah gak push ppl away..but if i can’t give my whole heart into something,i will not try..i will not lead you into false sense of security,that somehow you’ve gain place in my life when in fact you don’t..not yet..

I’m not a person who do people a favour when my whole hearts not in it..So you’re well assured that,when i did accept you in my life,it is not sympathy,its not rebaounce or confussion,its the real thing…

but one problem…
hehe…

i’m not sure when i’ll be ready to let go of my past..
if i’m worth it,wait..
if not,
you’re free to find someone else..

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s